It is said that the average adult makes about 35,000 decisions a day. That would mean that someone who sleeps seven hours a night makes about two decisions per second every day while awake. Even if these numbers are overstated, the truth is that we all have a lot on our minds and make many decisions every day. We juggle schedules, work issues, family issues, and more. It can get tiring.
One of the best jugglers I know is my wife, Susan. She writes, manages a team of people and hosts two podcasts. She is busy and has many decisions to make. She is great at managing everything but decisions can stress anyone out and taxed. And I don’t want that for my wife. I want her life to be as stress free as possible. So I don’t want to put her in a position where she has to make unnecessary decisions. None of us should do that to our husbands. Here are 3 decisions your partner shouldn’t be making.
1. Whether to rely on you
If you come home an hour later than you said, will you explain why, or will you leave your partner in the dark? If you’re upfront, your partner won’t have to wonder if you’re late for vague reasons. If you make it seem like a secret, maybe your partner can too ask if you are trustworthy. But he or she should be able to trust you, so don’t give your partner a reason not to. Avoid unnecessary time with people of the opposite sex. Don’t go places that might tempt you to make bad choices. Since “can you be trusted” is one of the decisions your partner shouldn’t be making, keep them informed. If your partner is going to trust you, you have to be trustworthy.
2. Whether to confide in
Your partner should never feel like it’s not safe to come to you to have big conversations. But your partner won’t want to confide in you if he or she feels like you don’t care or if you’ve already told others about something that’s meant to be kept private. Even making light of something that is very important to your partner can make them hesitant to confide in you again. So give your partner reasons to believe that whatever he or she shares from the heart will also pass into your heart. There shouldn’t be a more intimate relationship on earth than the one you have with your partner. Give your partner your full attention when he or she speaks, really listen and empathize.
3. Whether to rely on you
A colleague of mine describes a true friend as someone you can call when your car breaks down two hours from home at 11pm on a Tuesday and you have no doubt that this person will show up to give you a ride. This statement should be even more true for your spouse. He or she must be able to rely on you completely. There’s no question that you step up and fill in when your partner needs you. And your partner won’t question that if you consistently show up, focus on your relationship, and prioritize him or her.